. At the sign of the dollar. mb, Them facts what you state is convincing to some.) When families died after eating canned hospitals groaned with the victims of Congressman Snide, being Graft-on-the-spot,Was there with the Coroner, likely as not, 96 AT THE SIGN OF THE DOLLAR To prove tonsllitis,La grippe, meningitis,Had brought the poor victims to sudden soft applicationsOf friendly donationsBought silent consent from the willing andwise. (Said Congressman Hush, as he counted the dead,* Theres nothin so fatal as cold-in-the- head.) For food-education has long been
. At the sign of the dollar. mb, Them facts what you state is convincing to some.) When families died after eating canned hospitals groaned with the victims of Congressman Snide, being Graft-on-the-spot,Was there with the Coroner, likely as not, 96 AT THE SIGN OF THE DOLLAR To prove tonsllitis,La grippe, meningitis,Had brought the poor victims to sudden soft applicationsOf friendly donationsBought silent consent from the willing andwise. (Said Congressman Hush, as he counted the dead,* Theres nothin so fatal as cold-in-the- head.) For food-education has long been my hobby,Said Snide as the House was convened—in the Lobby, Ill teach that there Public the things what they I murder em all to accomplish the deed!The heart, lungs and thoraxNeeds brick-dust and borax—A fact which perhaps them there organs dontknow—Im killin folk off atA nominal profitFor me and the Pure Food Adulterant Co. {Said Congressman Leech, Its insplrin* to feelThat fellers onselfish and lofty Ideel! ). CRANKIDOXOLOGY (Being a Mental Attitude from BernardPshaw.) Its wrong to be thoroughly human, Its stupid alone to be good,And why should the virtuous woman Continue to do as she should? (Its stupid to do as you should!) For Id rather be famous than pleasant,Id rather be rude than polite;Its easy to sneerWhen youre witty and queer,And Id rather be Clever than Right. Im bored by mere Shakespeare and Milton,Though Hubbard compels me to rave; If / should lay laurels to wilt onThat fogy Shakespearean grave,How William would squirm in his grave! For Id rather be Pshaw than be Shakespeare,Id rather be candid than wise;And the way I amuseIs to roundly abuseThe Public I feign to despise. 97 9S AT THE SIGN OF THE DOLLAR Im a Socialist, loving my brother In quite an original way,With my maxim, Detest One Another — Though, faith, I dont mean what I say. (Its beastly to mean what you sayl) For Im fonder of talk than of Husbands,And Im fonder of fads than of Wives, So
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