Deportmental ditties : and other verses . Say, Count, is the phrase that an Oil Magnate daughterApplies to the nobleman Fortune has brought her,While he in reply should accost her as Madam,And not (be she never so stony) Macadam ! Militiamen love to be talked to as Major,While Laddie will always delight the Old nickname allotted to barmaids is Ducky,And Judge is reserved for the man from Colonel is probably safest and surestFor those who address an American tourist. MOBAL. Then make it a rule, if youre bent on succeeding,To show evry sign of good birth and good breeding

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Deportmental ditties : and other verses . Say, Count, is the phrase that an Oil Magnate daughterApplies to the nobleman Fortune has brought her,While he in reply should accost her as Madam,And not (be she never so stony) Macadam ! Militiamen love to be talked to as Major,While Laddie will always delight the Old nickname allotted to barmaids is Ducky,And Judge is reserved for the man from Colonel is probably safest and surestFor those who address an American tourist. MOBAL. Then make it a rule, if youre bent on succeeding,To show evry sign of good birth and good breeding,To do what is thought comme-il-faut and de rigueur,To browbeat the poor and to bully the nigger;But always assume an obsequious figureTo all who are richer than you are—or bigger. 65 E

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